Neighbors not Helping Neighbors

Another perfectly wretched glimpse into the culture here.

One night last summer, we were travelling home from a friend's house in a nearby village. It was probably around 9 or 9:30 and it was still quite warm, and a light breeze was gently blowing over the open steppe.

As we neared the edge of the city, where the houses just started to cluster together, there was an orange glow shimmering off in the distance- around 300 yards off the road on the right. At first, we didn't think anything at all unordinary about this. Fires burn in trash piles and bins all over the landscape, in and out of the city, all the time. But as we came closer, it became very obvious this was not ordinary trash fire. Instead the terrible orange glow took on the shape of a hideous dragon tongue flowing out the windows.

Coming from a culture who takes emergencies seriously, we hurried on to see if we could help in any way. Imagine our shock when we pulled off the road towards the, now raging, inferno and saw that there was NO ONE else coming to the aid of this household! The Water Guy ran to the house, while I ran to one of the neighbors to see if anyone was going to help.

The reply that came, as a crushing blow to my gut was, " We don't know them, so we won't help." That's it, no other explanation, no other excuse. Simply, we haven't met them, so we don't want to do anything about it.

Meanwhile, the Water Guy made sure everyone was out of the trap of death and safe. It turned out to be a man of his late 50's and his wife, both distraught and hysterical, respectively. The phrase she whimpered over and over- "my documents, ohhhh, my documents". The only thing we were able to save for them was a single long cotton seating cushion used for sitting around a low table. It happened to be hanging on the laundry line outside. One by one the windows exploded. Then the roof went up; it was about then the neighbors started to worry about themselves, screaming, "Our gas balloons, get the gas balloons". Sure enough, it was only a minute later that an incredible explosion and geyser of blue flame shot into the air about 100 feet. It was both terrifying and magnificent all at the same time.

One neighbor earlier on had taken the trouble to call the fire department, and we were told they were on the way. It took them a full 40 minutes to arrive to an already useless cause. They pulled out their leaky hoses, and attached them to the woefully inadequate trucks that carry far too little water for such a job. All we could was shake our heads at a classic case of "too little, too late".

The woman used our cell phone to make a call to her son, and wailed into the mouthpiece that all was lost, they needed to come immediately. That is all she could choke out. The man tried to console her, as did we, but she was not in a place where she could receive any comfort whatsoever. We decided our role had been played out, and that we should leave. The neighbors mosied back to their homes one by one- the show was over. For them, that was all it was. In this culture, family takes care of family. Aid never crosses social boundaries.

We drove as far as the road, but realized that someone back at the scene still had our cell phone. YIKES! Amateur mistake. We drove back to the now smoldering wreckage, and in the dark started asking those still loitering if they had our phone. We honestly thought it was a futile attempt to get back something that is such a hot commodity. Cell phones are the #1 pilfered item, and chances of anyone saying, "sure, here it is." were pretty close to nil. But, we lucked out, and the person who'd borrowed it gave it back without questions.

As I look back, I am still so sad to know that if we were ever to have an emergency, only a few sets of neighbors would likely show up to help. Although we "know" them, only a few are really kindhearted and helpful. In fact, when my son burned down the outdoor shower on accident (long story) a few came over and actually screamed at us for "endangering their property"!!

Ah well, it's comforting to know that if the 3 neighbors decide not to come, the fire department might.

Until Next Time,

Your SteppeSister